21 Stages of Getting Over a Long Term Relationshipby Marla Pachter on September 20, 2013
1. You had a BIG fight. The biggest fight yet. You decide to take a break.
2. It’s been three days and this break is killing you. “How about we hang out… just as friends?”
3. You get back together. Obviously.
4. But a week later you’re fighting again. And it’s even worse than the time before. This time you break up.
5. A week after that you get back together again. Then you break up AGAIN.
6. Repeat until you finally realize its time to cut contact.
7. At first you feel a sense of relief. It’s finally over. They’re out if your life forever.
8. But then you remember the way they just got you. The way no one else ever could.
9. “You’re doing the right thing!” Your friends say. “Don’t you touch that phone I will cut you.”
10. So you don’t call. But you think about them every day. It fucking hurts.
11. Finally you stop talking about them every 5 seconds.
12. Your friends think you’re doing so well.
13. Until one day out of the blue you hear from your ex. They want to be friends.
14. After the initial shock, you realize you want to be friends, too. You’re totally over it!
15. For a week, you guys talk again. It’s just like normal. You think this could really work.
16. Then of course you have the closure talk. It’s long and messy and snotty and you realize your ex never really respected you and you hate everything about them. Seriously, EVERYTHING.
17. Time to cut contact for good this time.
18. Suddenly, everything feels clearer. Like that relationship barely meant a thing in the scheme of your lifetime.
19. You realize you want to date again. Like actually date, not just get nasty with some rando.
20. One day you type the first letter of their name in Facebook graph search and they don’t even show up in auto-fill. And you don’t notice.
21. You meet a person with the same name and it doesn’t make your skin crawl.
That’s how you know, you’re over your ex.
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