“Midwestern nice” doesn’t mean what you probably think it means. Ehem, it actually refers to Midwesterns in the sack! And even if it doesn’t, kindness is very important in a mate, no? Plus, it’s no coincidence that most of the manliest cities in America are Midwestern places. Here’s why you should really date someone from the Midwest.
1. We know how to play outside.
2. Detroit is actually pretty trendy right now.
3. Even our hipsters smile.
4. All the money we save by never seeing a shrink can be spent on you.
5. We know where to get the best beer, cheese, or pizza in the country. Sometimes all three.
6. Even the prissy ones can play a sport.
7. We talk to our neighbors.
8. We are wildly impressed by people from other parts of the country… even if you’re a total bonehead.
9. Oh man, can we hold our liquor.
10. We know that being a good person and having fun aren’t mutually exclusive.
11. Everybody knows somebody who has a lake house. Take a trip! It’ll cost you, like, $25 for the entire weekend.
12. We actually want to know how your day was.
13. Cute accents. Sort of.
14. We can handle a tough winter.
15. Despite the fact that our hands are big, nothing was ever handed to us. We’re hard workers!
16. We laugh a lot.
17. We can take you to cool places before everyone else knows about them. Granted, they might be in Milwaukee.
18. We don’t put on airs. Because we can’t. Will someone explain to us why “tennis whites” are a thing?
19. We are a little afraid of you.
20. Some part of our childhood looks like a Norman Rockwell painting.
21. We can drive.
22. We make friends in bars.
23. If you’ve ever been enchanted by a Prairie Home Companion, it’s time to date one of us.
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