We all know that it takes some effort to keep a long-term relationship interesting. Certain qualities, like a sense of humor, a healthy sex drive, and an adventurous spirit, are widely credited with helping to stave off boredom in what could otherwise become a stale or predictable relationship. But there is one positive quality that often goes overlooked, unmentioned, or undervalued: the love of surprises. Here are five reasons why you should date someone who loves to surprise you.
Surprises require superior organizational and planning skills.
It is not easy to surprise someone. Even small surprises necessitate some degree of planning: furtive phone calls and e-mails to friends and family, special trips to the store for supplies, careful attention to schedules and timing and preferences, etc. Anyone who willingly subjects himself to that kind of stressful, exhausting planning process in your honor is pretty special (not to mention organized and responsible — two attractive qualities in a mate). Granted, a surprise might require your partner to keep secrets from you or even tell you a white lie, but every relationship needs a little mystery, right? Plus, the payoff is worth it.
A partner who surprises you is creative.
Sure, it’s hard to plan a surprise, but the hardest part of a surprise is actually thinking of it. A partner who surprises you is creative enough to see beyond the predictable routine of your everyday life — and beyond the usual clichés — and into some other space, where your relationship is still new and exciting and worth celebrating in ways that are specific to you. Surprises big and small are, at their core, hopeful and romantic gestures.
Surprises are thoughtful.
A partner who surprises you is likely already a very thoughtful person. When he or she plans a surprise, that thoughtfulness is taken to a new level. Surprisers go out of their way to think of the exact thing that will make you really, really happy, and then they do everything in their power to make it happen. That is so much better than the alternative (read: nothing special).
Surprises can make a mundane day feel like the best day.
Surprises don’t have to include expensive travel plans or thirty of your closest friends and family to be memorable. A few months ago, I went to work and left my phone at home. My boyfriend drove it over to me and (while I was in a meeting) left my phone on my desk — wrapped in tissue hot pink paper and a silver bow, with a funny note tucked inside. The gesture was creative, thoughtful, and unexpected, and it made me feel like the luckiest person on earth.
Surprises take the pressure off of you.
If someone is planning a surprise for you, then you don’t have to do a single thing except enjoy it. No organizing, no brainstorming, no obligatory phone calls, no making of guest lists, no worrying, no stressing, no shopping, no decision making. Just pure enjoyment. That is the best gift of all.