Advice

5 Ways Not To Screw Up the Second Date

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So, you had a great first date. AWESOME. Now comes the hard part: The second date.

The second date can be even more stressful than the first because now you both have expectations (AKA The Chemistry Killing Hellbeast). Don’t flip out, but don’t blow it. If you keep your head, you can keep your expectations in check without coming off all weird and distant. Here’s how.

1. Don’t Be Too Eager.
I don’t mean to suggest that you shouldn’t act too eager (even though you are). I’m actually saying DON’T BE TOO EAGER. You had a good date. It’s okay to be excited, but try not to think about it too much. Make a date with someone else. Throw yourself into your work. Have a drink with an old friend. Do whatever it takes to get your mind off of the new potential-mother-of-your-children for a couple of days, get your head on straight, then call.

2. Call (or text, but really, just call).
Just because you met online, doesn’t mean you have to stay online. The internet should be used to make a first date only. Messaging on the dating site you met on after you’ve already spent hours talking in person is lame. Just call.

3. Suggest Something She Might Like
There was chemistry. The conversation was flowing and you must have learned a thing or two about her interests and desires. It’s not the time to suggest that she come over to your place so you can show her your collection of pre-80′s GI JOE’s (in their original packaging, natch). Try to remember something she said and suggest a second date that you’ll feel comfortable going on, but that is more in line with her interests.

4. You Had a Good Time. Act Like It.
Don’t play it cool. Just be cool. Follow up on things she mentioned (“How’d your bowling team do on Sunday?” “Your sister came to visit, right?” etc.). She’s not going to think that you’re less of a man because you payed attention. Pick up where you left off.

5. But, Don’t Get Too Comfortable
The second date is not the time to bring up that your last relationship failed because of your mother dressed you up in a frilly apron and made you bake your own birthday cake when you were 11. You and your date made a connection. A bridge has been built between the two of you. No need to drive a UHaul full of your issues over it and see if it holds.