Chivalry is dead? Nah. Chivalry is just… whatevs. Some women like it, some don’t, some feel mixed about it. You want to do something nice for someone, do it, but most of what is considered “chivalrous” is really just common courtesy.
With that in mind, I just read The Frisky’s list of 12 Little Things Guys Do That Impress Us Big Time, which in my opinion, it sets the bar a little low. Like, sadly low.
#2 Taking my purse while I’m struggling to get my coat on or off
#10 Carrying my heavy bag without me asking
The fact that the basics are being considered above and beyond is kind of alarming. Holding the door for for a lady shouldn’t be your A-game, dude. You’re better than that.
Low standards are murder for guys. There’s been a lot of talk as of late about how the general lameness is of dudes is directly proportionate to the tragically low expectations of women. Let’s. End. This. Here.
Guys. Who cares whether or not women’s standards have fallen? Impress yourselves. Impressing women is a naturally occurring bi-product of actually being awesome. If you work toward awesomeness, and become more awesome, you will be helping to raise the standards for all guys and contribute to the betterment of mankind.
You in? Okay, here’s how:
1. Deal With Yourself
If you’re not in therapy and you’ve never been in therapy, trust me, you could use some. I don’t want to hear any of this “uhhhh why should I sit around and pay someone to talk about my feelings?” crap. Shut up. Do you want to be awesome? Start figuring out why you’re not. At the very least, keep a freakin’ journal. Seriously. It doesn’t have to be a shrink, but start talking to someone about why you are how you are.
2. Take Your Friendships Seriously
Especially the ones you’ve had for a long time. When you hit post-adolescence, it’s your friends, really, that are raising you. And you’re raising them, too. It’s a responsibility.
3. Know Some Stuff
You don’t have to know everything, but know some stuff. I’m not talking about geeking out on Green Lantern Corps history, here (though by no means am I discouraging that and I’m jealous that you know more than I do). What I’m saying is, take steps to cultivate your natural curiosity. Pick a few good blogs and read them regularly. Get on some news letters. Check out the Radiolab podcast.
Then, the next time you find yourself having a drink with a woman, you might actually be curious about what she does and where she came from instead of just asking the same questions that every other guy asks.
4. Become a Connoisseur
This one’s easy. Just refuse to eat bad food and drink bad beer all the time and you’re on your way. However, and this is important: Just because you know it, doesn’t mean you should talk about it. Taste is something you use. A women doesn’t care how many whiskey distilleries you can rattle off. That’s geeky. But ordering her a drink that she’s never had before and LOVES? That’s cool.
5. Keep Moving Forward
This is probably the most important of all. You got the job? You got the girl? That’s a good start. Once you stop impressing yourself, you’ll soon find that no one else is impressed by you either. Relax, yes. Enjoy yourself. But never stop striving to be more awesome.
Dude. You owe it to all of us.