Google has released its 2013 Zeitgeist lists, which chart the most searched-for terms of the year. As always, these results provide a fascinating (if largely predictable) glimpse into our digital inner life – celebrities and news events dominated our attention, with the most common search subjects including the late Paul Walker, the Boston Marathon, the iPhone 5S and Miley Cyrus. But we’re surprised by one query that cracked the top 10 so-called “what is” searches in the UK: “What is spooning?”
Really, guys? Really? Everyone should know exactly what spooning is, because it is an unalienable human right. Allow me to walk you through it.
Spooning is not a sex act (although it is a sex position), but a common means of cuddling. Think of spoons neatly arranged in a drawer. Their bowls are perfectly aligned, the hollow of each lying flush with the next.
This position is great for sleeping and watching TV, as well as for post-coital recovery time. It’s easy, and entirely intuitive – in fact, I suspect that many who Google “what is spooning” have already spooned without realizing it. Here’s how it works: Find a bed, couch, futon or particularly comfy floor. Lay down on your side, next to your partner, facing in the same direction. Bend your knees. Snuggle close, stomach to back. Curl an arm around your partner. Overcome by lovely, tingly feelings of security and closeness? Congratulations, you’re spooning.
These attractive stock photo couples have kindly volunteered to demonstrate.
But spooning, while intimate, isn’t just for couples. You can spoon your friends. You can spoon your kids. You can spoon your pets. Your pets can even spoon each other. (If they do, please take photos and send them to me immediately.)
The person on the exterior of the cuddle, whose arm encircles his or her mate, is known as the big spoon. The other is the little spoon. Contrary to popular belief, the big spoon and the little spoon aren’t inherently gendered. Many mistakenly assume that the female or physically smaller partner must necessarily be the little spoon, but that’s not the case. If you’re used to exclusively snuggling in one role or the other, I highly recommend mixing it up.
As delightful as spooning may be, the position isn’t without its pitfalls. If the little spoon has long hair, that can inconveniently find its way into the big spoon’s mouth. The big spoon’s breath can unpleasantly tickle the back of the little spoon’s neck. The big spoon will often find his or her arm falling asleep under the weight of the little spoon. (To avoid this, try sliding your dead arm under your pillow instead.)
Don’t worry, newbies, you’ll have spooning down pat in no time – then you can get back to more important things, like Googling “What is twerking?” and “What is Illuminati?” (#1 and #5 on the same Zeitgeist list).