Guys, Here’s Why You Should Never Wear a Beanie in Your Dating Profile

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It’s still kind of winter in New York, so understandably most dating profile pictures reflect the seasonal limbo we’re currently in: beanies and peacoats galore. Which for some strange reason is super attractive to me. Much like the blue jeans, white T-shirt, boat shoes combo, beanies (or toques or toboggans or watch caps or whatever) symbolize a beacon of simplicity in style. And I like that shit.

But on further inspection, the members of this pool of gentlemen that wear these hats aren’t trying to keep warm or be stylish. They’re ultimately hiding something. Yes, most of them are bald.

Now here’s the thing, I don’t mind bald men. There are a lot of reasons why dating bald men is actually a better idea than dating their hairy counterparts. And I don’t think not having hair is especially unattractive. A shaved head is so much more attractive than wispy strands attempting to cover an ever-thinning hairline. No one has married Donald Trump because of his hair!

But it’s not like these men were doing that — they all have shaved heads. Instead of embracing their naked noggins, they hid under hats, and I ended up three pictures deep in their profiles before it was revealed that they had opted for a Bic rather than a comb. It was all a ruse, a cunning attempt to trick me. I felt duped.

I understand that most men with bald heads figure that it’ll be a turn off for a main profile picture, but in all honesty, I was more turned off that I was misled from the start. Yes, it’s something as simple as how one’s hair looks, but it’s also a little bit of a lie. I don’t want to speak for other women, but I think it’s so much more attractive that a guy is confident enough to pull off a bald head and be proud that he has it, not hide behind a trendy hat only to have someone find out later on.

Take the beanies off and take a new picture, please. If we’re going to start something new, let’s do it by being open and honest about what we really look like, and adult enough to embrace some of the things about ourselves that might make us uncomfortable.  Plus, it’s starting to get warm out and you look stupid wearing beanies in the hot weather. But that’s another story.