How to Hook Up: A Guide For Women

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Perplexing as it may sound, women can have just as much trouble as men when it comes to getting someone to hook up with them. The question on the table, then, is What is the way to a man’s pants? Here are some suggestions and guidelines:

1. Throw away your Emily Post. Some guys will see you across the room, sense the looks and smiles and vibes you’re giving, and walk over to start seducing you. But a lot of guys won’t, ok, and this is 2012, so first thing is you have to be willing to make some moves. Go up and give him a random compliment, start dancing with him if there’s music, or maybe buy him a drink.

2. Be forward, but not aggressive. To a great extent, guys are suspicious of a woman coming on to them aggressively. But at the same time, a person who knows what they want and goes after it is universally sexy. So what’s the difference?

–> Forward =  “Yeah I like that movie too, totally. Also you’re kinda cute – do you want to buy me a drink?”

–> Aggressive = Drunkenly intruding on his group of friends and giving him your number on a cocktail napkin.

3. What if he’s not getting that you’re interested? Maybe you’re being forward (or at least think you are), but he seems oblivious to your advances. Best way to take it up a notch? Initiate some physical contact: subtly let a few fingers drop near his hand, let your leg brush up against his without pulling back, or drape an arm over his shoulder. He’ll get it.

4. Alcohol is (mostly) your friend. You just want to loosen him up a little, not get him stumbling his way back to your apartment.

5. How to get him back to your place? I think this one is so much easier for women than for men, and honestly, women skate around this more than they need to. The most inviting phrasings I’ve heard are the simple ones: “Why don’t we go back to my place?” works just fine. Or “Come home with me,” or “Let’s get in a cab.” Don’t overthink it, and don’t forget that a lot of guys are going to wait for this invitation.

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