Love Advice From America’s Oldest Married Couple

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John and Ann Betar have been married for 81 years. That is a very long time. That’s enough time to see 14 presidents, or enough time to walk the circumference of the Earth 56 times, or enough time to watch almost all of Doctor Who! Wow. That makes the Betars America’s longest married couple, and they didn’t even get to post five million Facebook photos of their engagement back in the early 1930s. Mirror Online spoke to the lovebirds about their secrets to lasting marital bliss – and the one thing that threatened to drive them apart forever.

Just kidding. They only ever fought about food. Ha, these crazy kids! The Betars stress one thing above all when building a healthy union: talk, talk, talk. John says it’s all about finding “contentment.” Ann picks up on the thread, finishing his thought for him (aw, c’mon!): “If you think a little bit about what you’re doing and if it’s wrong and he tries to straighten it out, we straighten it out. And if not, you just try to go along with it.” Basically, Ann says, “you learn to accept one another’s way of life.”

But those food fights. No, not the kind where John throws tapioca at Ann’s face while she sprays him with prune juice. The Betars’ only moments of marital discord come when they discuss cooking. “It’s only about cooking,” John says, “that’s the only arguments we had.” And now, TheDateReport has gained exclusive access to a recreation of a scene from the Betar kitchen:

“Do you want the chicken piccata?”

“Again? We had that on Thursday.”

“It was Wednesday.”

“I love you. But your chicken piccata is nasty.”

“I have loved you for 81 years. And shut up about my chicken.”