Not So Serious

Reddit Users Explain How They Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Fart Bomb

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I like cheese. I like broccoli. I get beans in my burritos because they’re a staple. And, without a doubt, whenever I get beans in my burritos I think of that childhood rhyme: “Beans, beans, they’re good for your heart, the more you eat, the more you fart.” Beans are just one of the many delicious foods we all eat that lead to toots. Farts are one of a million other embarrassing bodily functions, so I’ve never understood why we pass our gas in shame if everyone does it. Sharing a bed with someone after a party, I remember being too tired to care about the gas I felt coming. I sat up quickly to warn him, just before he turned to me to say the same exact thing. We laughed so hard at our timing, each appreciating the other’s thoughtfulness.

I didn’t realize it then, but that moment of truth has a name, and it’s called the Fart Barrier. Some couples break the Fart Barrier by accident; others through necessity. But however you two break the Fart Barrier, once you do, you can never go back: farts have the magical ability to save marriages, create icebreakers, and bring couples closer together. You could call it one level below swapping apartment keys. That being said, for all your good intentions, breaking the Fart Barrier can definitely get awkward, as these Reddit users explain:

Sometimes, you can’t hold your farts in:


You can fart on the first date:


Sometimes, you fart because you want to reciprocate:


And sometimes you never, ever fart:


You can fart if you’re lactose intolerant:


You fart because you want them to be comfortable:


And sometimes, you fart because you’re in it for the long haul: