Here’s a good reason to get over your shyness: talking about sex with your partner makes for better sex. Easy as pie! Mmmmm, sex and pie.
According to a recent study published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, just feeling comfortable talking about sex is directly connected to good sex.
These results aren’t surprising, but important to keep in mind. As anyone who’s ever babbled their way through a 1st date knows, communicating helps reduce anxiety. Plus, speaking up has the public health benefit of increasing the likelihood of safe sex (reminding him to put on the condom does not exactly qualify as dirty talk—in most situations).
Over 207 people completed surveys with an average age of 29. They were asked about their sexual self-esteem, communication, and satisfaction. Those more nervous in discussing sex were less likely to enjoy it and visa versa.
If you’re painfully shy, don’t sulk silently to yourself. The good news is nonverbal cues fared even better than verbal cues at improving sex in the study, so a well-timed moan can do wonders for direction without saying a word.
Yelena Shuster is excited that science keeps substantiating her love of talking.