In our ever-evolving digital dating world, we are struck with endless potential partners on a swipe-right basis. Because of this, we are constantly stumbling across the same attributes in potential partners on various dates. You have your “heart-palpitating, amazing conversation, marry me” date, you have your “literally cannot wait to jump their bones” date, and you have your “not that into them but it’s a nice lil’ ego hit” date. The problem? We can never seem to find that one person that encapsulates every emotion we are looking for – they are always one of the three.
I sat down with a friend of mine last week and he informed me of what can only be described as the best casual dating strategy I have ever heard: The Rotation. What, you may ask, the f**ck is a ‘rotation’? It is the subtle art of dating three people at once.
Now, before you get all anti-fuckboy/lady-esque on me, the rotation of these three people is balanced at the time of non-exclusivity. Ultimately, it is the hierarchy of the rotation trifecta that makes it genius. Each personal rotation should feature three potential-partner-types.
Let’s get stuck into it.
NUMERO UNO: THE ONE YOU WANT TO LOVE
This person is number one in your rotation. They are hotter than you, they make you laugh, they are, in many ways, completely out of your league. When you first scored a date with that person you thanked your lucky stars they chose you. You are more into them then they are you, and you both know it. Your rotation trifecta is wholly ruled by this person wearing the pants. You want them to be exclusive with you – but they can’t commit. When they make plans with you, you make plans with the other two based around your Uno’s schedule.
NUMERO DUE: THE ONE YOU WANT TO F*CK
Number two in the rotation. This is the person who you are extremely physically attracted to. They may not be as good looking or as interesting as Numero Uno, but when they get down they get down good, and your sexual chemistry is off the charts. Keep this person on booty call speed dial – however limit dirty dalliances to once a week.
NUMERO TRE: THE ONE YOU WANT TO WANT YOU
Number three… we have all experienced. This poor devil really likes you, however you are comme ci comme ça about them. At the same time, they give you a good ego hit in their affections. To them, you are Numero Uno – and they are a nice little reminder that you deserve to be treated like a Numero Uno, too. See this person for a date night once a week – bench them when things get weird. (What’s benching, you ask? Find out here).
The art of mastering the rotation? Only see each person once a week (if not, less). Make sure each numero knows that your relationship is non-exclusive (as that could get super awkward turtle), and most importantly – enjoy a dating life of non-committal joy, in which you can capture the perfect balance of partners every week. Shit yeah!