Advice

50 Pickup Lines For The Farmers Market

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Because life is sexier with fresh, organic produce.

1. Mmm, these honey samples are so mouthwatering.

2. I forgot my reusable bag, can I borrow one of yours?

3. Have you ever frolicked in the fields of [name of your favorite farm]?

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4. What do you do in your off season?

5. I’d love to do a vegetable wash for you.

6. Are you still looking for seasonal labor?

7. Can I offer you a slice of my pie?

8. Can I help you pitch your stand?

9. It sure is hot under this tent.

10. These plums are so soft.

11. What’s your favorite way to eat rhubarb? [Wait for answer] I’d love to make it for you.

12. So, how long have you been pickling these cucumbers?

13. This bushel is so dry, let’s change that.

14. I know you make artisan cheese, but what else can you do with your hands?

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15. How long does it take for your bread to rise?

16. If you were a bouquet of fresh cut flowers, I would take you home.

17. Let’s get dirty.

18. Isn’t it tuber time?

19. These bags of organic spinach would make some great pillows don’t you think?

20. Want to show me how to make steamy greens?

21. It’s funny how slippery this jam is!

22. Want to melt my beeswax candles tonight?

23. I hear lavender makes underwear drawers smell nice, does it?

24. I’ve always wanted to be a farmer’s wife.

25. That hand spun sweater looks big enough for two to get cozy in.

26. These Heirloom tomatoes are so firm and juicy.

27. I like baby carrots because they totally fit in your mouth.

28. Want to come over later and help me shuck?

29. I hear spices like cayenne can act as an aphrodisiac? Do you know?

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30. You sure have big baguettes!

31. These two quail eggs just fit in my hand perfectly.

32. Do you need helping seeding your flower garden for next season?

33. How early do you rise?

34. I like my men like my homemade bread, dense.

35. I see you’re pretty skilled at churning your butter.

36. This beer has a very sensual taste. What were you thinking of when you brewed it?

37. Can I be your next varietal?

38. You’re so cute I’d add you to my woven basket.

39. How do you like your organic, free range eggs?

40. Those Carhartt overalls would look even better on my floor.

41. Want to cross pollinate?

42. Your hands seem to be full. I have big panniers you can borrow to bike all that produce home.

43. Do you prefer organic or local? Because I’m both.

44. I’d love a taste of that [insert name of product] before I commit to buying.

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45. What a huge eggplant.

46. Can I wear your plaid flannel when I make you breakfast tomorrow morning?

47. Are you as spicy as your artisan hot sauce?

48. What else can you pickle?

49. Oh, you’re out of eggs? That’s ok, you can have mine.

50. I’d like to see your full farmer’s tan.

–Amy DuFault and Anna Brones

This post originally appeared on ecosalon

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