1. Did we go to high school together, or do you look familiar because I’m already in love with you?
2. High school was hell… and you were the hottest thing there.
3. Of all the gin joints, in all the towns, in all the world, you walked into this one, according to your Foursquare account, which I have been stalking ever since I got home.
4. If I’d have known I’d see you here, I’d have been sitting on this bar stool since my 21st birthday.
5. I don’t have a yacht, but I have over 100 Twitter followers.
6. I can’t believe I haven’t seen you in 8 years. You don’t look a day over 15. Wait, is that creepy?
7. I have a 401K now. That’s a type of blood condition, right?
8. Did you have Mrs. O’Brien for 8th grade English class? No? Me neither! We have so much in common.
9. It’s a shame sexting wasn’t a thing when we were in high school.
10. Wanna be my high school sweetheart?
11. Hey! I think you owe me a beer. Technically, you owe me a pile of soggy cheese fries from sophomore year, but I’ll take a beer.
12. You’re like a turkey in the oven all day. Just getting hotter and hotter.
13. I’ve been to jail so much less than everyone else we went to school with.
14. Remember when you winked at me in Chemistry class when you had iodine in your eye? I’ve never forgotten that.
15. Hello. I am not the girl put bologna in her pants on the bus in middle school.
16. It’s so funny that you were this hot cheerleader and I was a bumbling nerd because now WILL YOU MARRY ME?
17. Hey cutie, your next drink’s on me. (I’ve saved a lot of money because I’m still on my parents’ phone plan.)
18. Just because I haven’t seen you in 10 years doesn’t mean I haven’t thought of you every day.
19. High school yearbooks kind of remind me of wedding albums. I’m not married.
20. Ahhh, high school. Remember the time we made out in the parking lot in 15 minutes from right now?