Breakups

Broken-Hearted Guy Uses Yelp Reviews to Record His Relationship

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East Village Sidewalk After Dark (New York, NY)

When you break up, the whole city becomes a reminder of what once was. That’s not just a Chipotle, that’s your Chipotle. Or it was your Chipotle — now it’s just a reminder of your broken heart.

And so, when 31-year-old New Yorker Chase Compton found himself dumped, he did what every person with strong feelings does: he turned to Yelp. One restaurant review at a time, he’s writing the history of his relationship. In a post about a Mediterranean restaurant Cafe Mogador, Compton waxes poetic about the joys of brunching together (“He gets the Mediterranean Eggs, and I get the Halloumi Eggs with a side of merguez every time. It just feels right, and it feels like home, and it’s what I always want,” he writes). A review of French Roast mentions pumpkin ravioli, but the food is incidental — French Roast, Compton writes, is the place where he and his boyfriend finally broke up. It still gets five stars, though — all the restaurants do. And besides, Compton notes, “It’s not the French Roast’s fault that I got dumped on Thanksgiving and ended up there.” At Minetta Tavern, they argued. At Von, they made out.

Together, the reviews form what Compton calls “a topographical map of my love story.” They don’t tell you whether you’d like to go to, say, Uncle Ted’s Modern Chinese (“We were just two guys in love, building a home together, and eating Chinese”), but that’s not the point. The places themselves don’t matter. The memories of those places do.

[h/t Business Insider]