Kim Kardashian and Kanye West, unsurprisingly, are inviting Jay-Z and Beyoncé to their wedding. This, surprisingly, is making some people very angry. In fact, dozens of Mrs. Carter’s fans have signed a petition requesting that she refuse to attend.
Here’s how John Barry, the petition’s creator, puts it: “Beyonce should not be forced to go and sit thru that torture while surrounded by the Kardashian pigs” [sic, and also a little sick?]. He’s also offered Beyoncé a selection of gracious excuses, from pretending Blue Ivy is sick to jetting off for an emergency meeting with the Obamas.
Needless to say, whining about Beyoncé’s RSVP is RSVP (Really Stupid, Vapid and Pointless, y’all). Yes, I too would much rather invite Jay and Bey to a couples game night and/or zombie apocalypse survival team, but Kim and Beyoncé do seem pretty friendly, or at least our-husbands-are-close-so-we’re-reasonably-polite friendly.
Here’s the thing: this is representative of a sizable percentage of the casual relationships you’ll have in your adult life. You will be invited to – and you will frequently attend, because that’s how modern human society works – the nuptials of coworkers, distant cousins, college roommates’ siblings, across-the-street neighbors, and plenty of other people whose lives you aren’t particularly invested in. If going to somebody’s wedding constituted a 100-percent endorsement of that couple and everything they stand for, we’d all be in trouble. Plus, if weddings were inherently fun, they wouldn’t need to serve so much booze.
More importantly, judging from the proposal alone, you and I both know that the reception’s going to be crazy. Kimye’s tastes aren’t exactly subtle. Even if mother-of-the-bride Kris Jenner herself punched your mother in the face, you should still want an invitation to that wedding. In fact, I would personally punch my mom in the face if it meant I could have an invitation to that wedding. And I think she’d fully support me. Why would the BeyHive want to deny their Queen Bee that chance?