Advice

Tell Me If You Think This Is Weird: Elf Ear Surgery Turns Me On

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Oh God. I’m in trouble.

Women (and men, I suppose but don’t care) are now having minor surgery that makes their ears all pointy. Like elves. Permanently like elves.

ABC News wants to imply that the surgery is somehow dangerous, but that’s silly. The only thing dangerous about it is that now I won’t be able to stop thinking about all the crazy woodland sex that I want to be having with these elf-ladies.

Seriously. It’s rendered me useless.

Is that weird?*

[BuzzFeed]

*I’m still going to think it’s hot either way, but my editor is making me ask the question.