Advice

Tell Me If You Think This Is Weird: I Keep A List Of Date Conversation Topics

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Are you weird about dating? We’re here to help you figure it out! Just email us a question and we’ll tell you whether or not we think (whatever it is) is weird.

“Let Me Just Refer To My Notes, Here…”

Kelly, 25, writes:

“Whether I’ve been seeing someone for 3 dates or 3 months, I always get nervous that we’re going to run out of things to talk about. So I keep a list on my phone of things I want to remember to tell them (or ask them about). Usually, they’re about things that have happened recently…but if the list is short and I’m REALLY nervous, I’ll add a few from my go-to bucket of stories. (“Oh, did I ever tell you about the time I….”)

I’m pretty sure this is weird and neurotic. But HOW weird is it? Am I the only person who does this?”

We Say:

Are you the only person who does this? In the whole world? Probably not. It does seem a little, as you put it, “neurotic.” But if you’re a neurotic person in general, this little habit is pretty smart.

If a loo-oo-oong awkward silence is your dating Worst Case Scenario, then good for you for preparing for it. First of all, by preparing conversation topics ahead of time, you’re sure to find plenty of things to talk about and will know how to react if an awkward silence does occur.

But perhaps most importantly, thinking about your Worst Case Scenario and preparing for it probably makes you so much more confident going into the date. Everyone has their own way of dealing with pre-date jitters: some people do tequila shots, you do research. It really doesn’t matter how weird or quirky your pre-date ritual is, as long as it makes you feel confident and ready for your date.

One suggestion though? Try not to refer to your phone notes during the date, and definitely don’t let on that you made them. That really would be weird.

Got a “Tell Me If You Think This Is Weird” question? Email chiara@howaboutwe.com.

Previously: Tell Me If You Think This Is Weird: My Boyfriend Snaps His Fingers During Sex

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