Advice

Tell Me If You Think This Is Weird: My Girlfriend Won’t Spend The Night

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Are you weird about dating? Send us a question and we’ll tell you, as honestly as we possibly can, whether or not we think (whatever it is) is weird. Today’s topic: Kyle’s girlfriend won’t spend the night.

Kyle says:

“I can’t figure out if this is weird or if it’s a good thing. I’ve gone out with this girl about six times, and we’ve slept together four times. She always comes over to my place (though I have seen her apartment, so I know she’s not living with a guy or anything). We’ll have sex, she’ll stick around for about an hour after, and then she’ll take off. She’s never spent the entire night. She says she just sleeps better at home, has to get up early for work, etc.

This doesn’t bother me, because, well, I like having my bed for myself. But no other girl I’ve ever been with has refused to stay over, so I’m just wondering: is this weird?”

We Say: The first night sleeping with someone (actually sleeping) is often uncomfortable, and given the choice, we’d always opt to sleep in our own beds.

BUT. Once you’ve been seeing someone a while, it starts to get weird to not spend the night. Aren’t all those late night commutes tiring? Don’t you ever want breakfast in the morning? Or morning sex?

We say this girl is a little weird, Kyle. Or maybe she’s just not that into you.

What do you think? How long can a person in a relationship get away with not spending the entire night?