The Story Of The Guy Who Liked Mud, And The Girl Who Didn’t

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Just when we thought we’d heard it all, some dude writes to Savage Love about traumatizing his wife with his mud fetish.

We always enjoy reading Dan Savage’s sex column, but today’s was especially good. Basically, a WAM-enthusiast (WAM=Wet And Messy, and no, we didn’t know that acronym either…) confesses his unusual fetish to his fiance. She responds positively, so he goes out and buys a bunch of mud. And that’s where things started to go wrong for him…

“Once I got the bathtub full of the “mud,” got naked, and started to coax her into the room, she totally freaked out.”

Uh-oh. Things didn’t go down like he planned. So does the guy calm his fiancee and try to convince her that it might actually be fun? Nope.

“Needless to say, I was mortified and disappointed, and there was $50 worth of clay in the tub that I didn’t want to go to waste. So I locked her out and decided to try to make the best of it. “

WTF, dude???

There is nothing wrong with fetishes and preferences, but there IS something wrong with locking the door on your fiancee and masturbating into a tub full of mud in the bathroom.

As Savage smartly points out:

“At that moment, she may have concluded that given a choice between her and a tub full of clay, you would choose a tub full of clay-because that’s just what you did… and yet she married you anyway.”

[Savage Love: Clay Time]