Date Ideas

Here Comes the Perfect Date Movie: What to See in Theaters This Weekend

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Editor’s note: Meet Lindsey and Bobby, two pop culture fanatics who’ll be sharing their date night movie picks with us each week. Check back next Friday for more!

Bobby: Hey Lindsey.

Lindsey: What’s up Bobby? Looking forward to the weekend ahead?

Bobby: Oh yeah. So many great movie options. Fall is in full swing.

Lindsey: Such a nice diversity of stuff, I’m impressed. (And TV’s back, but that’s another column.)

Bobby: Yes. We’re not here to talk about TV. Even though I want to discuss Homeland SO badly. ANYWAY.

Lindsey: OH man, Homeland!!!!!! Don’t get me started.

Bobby: The big releases: Argo / Seven Psychopaths / Here Comes the Boom / Sinister.

Lindsey: Wow, those are big. I’d see at least 3/4s of those off the bat, this is going to be a tough one… But let’s say you’re going on a date, not just a movie buff like us. What would work best?

Bobby: Hmm. Let’s start with Argo. FROM THE DIRECTOR OF THE TOWN AND HOLLYWOODLAND – BEN AFFLECK. This is supposed to be great, thrilling, mass-audience entertainment. I’m certainly down.

Lindsey: I do have a soft spot for Ben. It’s called being from the Boston-area.
It does look a little…boring? Sorry, sorry, I get that it’s a CONTENDER, but he has a weird haircut.

Bobby: I have a soft spot for Ben, too. It’s called I saw Forces of Nature opening day.

Lindsey: :(

Bobby: Yeah, it’s too obvious I think. We’ll all see it eventually. Certainly see it with your date at SOME POINT, but I think we have better options.

Lindsey: I feel like it’ll be one of those movies I rush to see before Oscar season.

Bobby: Yes. Like The Artist last year. “QUICK AND SEE IT BEFORE IT WINS EVERYTHING TOMORROW.”

Lindsey: Shh I still haven’t seen The Artist.

Bobby: Eh. It’s not great. BUT I can’t wait for Ben to accept a directing Oscar. We all know it’s gonna happen.

Lindsey: He deserves it! Matt & Ben make us Boston folk proud.

Bobby: ANYWAY. Moving on. Seven Psychopaths was written/directed by the writer/director of one of my all-time favorites, In Bruges. So.

Lindsey: I never saw it. So.

Bobby: Oh, it’s wonderful.

Lindsey: Also this looks stupid? Sorry? The posters in the subway are…weird.
Meanwhile, ensemble casts are always something to chat about! You can look up all their IMDB’s after the film.

Bobby: Yeah. That’s true. Or during the film if you’re an asshole who uses their phone during movies. Colin Farrell though. Love him forever. And I will always feel guilty for loving him as much as I do.

Lindsey: Okay, I buy it. Add that one to the “Maybe” list. What’s next?

Bobby: HERE COMES HERE COMES THE BOOM

Lindsey: Well to that I say, HERE COMES THE PERFECT DATE MOVIE.

Bobby: I must admit, I love movies about inspirational teachers. Mr. Holland’s Opus! Stand & Deliver! Dangerous Minds! AKEELAH AND THE BEE?!?!

Lindsey: If your idea of the perfect man is Kevin James, definitely check out Here Comes The Boom. If your idea of the perfect man is NOT Kevin James, you should still check it out. But you also get to see Kevin James shirtless. At least once. Don’t forget it.

Bobby: :( don’t remind me

Lindsey: Did you get to see Mr. Holland shirtless? I think not.

Bobby: SALMA HAYEK IS IN IT THOUGH.

Lindsey: Do you get to see her shirtless? I have needs.

Bobby: Probably not. But I’m sure she wears flattering tops. OK. Last one. The Ethan Hawke horror movie, Sinister.

Lindsey: A scary one—always a good date movie as we’ve previously discussed.
In case you DON’T Find the idea of Kevin James shirtless scary enough, I guess.

Bobby: Yeah. I’m definitely interested. I loved Insidious, and this seems to be in a similar vein. It’s Ethan Hawke and some demon that’s terrorizing his family? I think?

Lindsey: Who cares?

Bobby: Ethan is decked out in tons of cardigans I think.

Lindsey: Oh!

Bobby: Dad Ethan.

Lindsey: Okay, I’m listening. This is all you need Bobby: you, your date, Ethan Hawke, a couple of smokes, a cup of coffee, And a little bit of conversation.

Bobby: True. But what’s our FINAL DECISION?

Lindsey: If you’re dating Ethan Hawke, take him to Here Comes The Boom?

Bobby: And if you’re dating Kevin James, take him to Here Comes The Boom?

Lindsey: That sounds about right.

Lindsey Weber is a writer living in Brooklyn and her favorite part of You’ve Got Mail is when Dave Chappelle calls Meg Ryan “fine.”
Bobby Finger is (also) a writer living in a Brooklyn and his favorite part of You’ve Got Mail is anytime Steve Zahn enters a scene.

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