Listen, when guys get wasted EVERYTHING we do is unattractive. We slur, we leer, we look like gross, sad apes. It’s a bad scene.
Women, on the other hand, can kind of pull it off. IF and only IF you can pull yourself together and avoid ALL of the following:
1. Singing “Pour Some Sugar on Me” at the top of your lungs
This song should be called “Have Terrible Sex With Me”
Stumbling sober is cute and Tina Fey-like. Stumbling drunk is sad and Snooki-like.
3. Asking me if you’re a terrible person
4. Saying “I need to vom” (actual vomiting not nearly as unattractive)
Honestly, I’d prefer “barf.”
5. Missing the straw
Imagine the face you’re making when it stabs you in the lip. Yeah, that one.
6. Deciding that now is a good time to try out winking for the first time
Is that…Do you have a twitch or something?
It’s totally cool. It happens. Just try to avoid the above and you’ll come off as more or less charming.