Looking for a boo-tiful new man or woman to haunt your house? Tired of connecting with spiritual presences only to find out their the astral projection of a living person? Don’t make the grave (get it?) mistake of waiting around for a special someone to kick the bucket. Take action. Join GhostSingles.com.
If you’re still breathing and walking the physical Earth than you’ll have to wait until the afterlife to sign up for the latest dating site, aimed squarely at ghosts looking to share their bed sheet with another on the other side. Poltergeists between the ages of 18 and 180 can sign up for GhostSingles.com and sift through pages of eligible dead or jump right into a chat room free-for-all, with eager ghosts looking to strike up some paranormal activity.
But beware: If you’re not a ghost and you use the chat as a workaround digital séance, ghastly admins will seize your computer.
For ghosts with trepidation over entering the dating scene of beyond, GhostSingles.com has some sage advice.
“Worried what your loved ones you left behind might think of your new dating life? Don’t! They’re probably far more worried what you think of their lives, which, in fact, are probably disgraceful. If you go check on them right now, odds are (at least with the current generation) that they’re just sitting in front of a computer screen, surfing the internet. You could probably stand right behind them, breath cold air down their necks, and they’d hardly notice.”
GhostSingles.com is free to use, so anyone stuck in limbo can crossover without delay. As long as their transparent hands can touch a keyboard.
Matt Patches is a writer and reporter living in New York City. His work has been featured on Vulture, Time Out New York, and The Hollywood Reporter. He is the host of the pop culture podcast Operation Kino.