Unless falling flat on your back in the sleet on your way to work counts as a snow angel, city winters aren’t all that fun for grownups. Snowflakes, though kind of magical when falling past the streetlights, quickly gang up to become a day-ruining filth. If this season has one redeeming quality for urban adults, the winter kiss has got to be it.
Maybe it’s only by contrast to my general misery, but cold weather smooches always feel just a dash more romantic.
The Hands in Pockets Kiss
You’re so cold. So cold. Your hands are still basically unusable in two layers of gloves. But you will not be stopped. You bump your bundled bodies together like awkward teenage walruses and somehow find each others faces. There’s a quick peck, but you make it count and – for a split second – you’re warm all over.
The You’re Cold/They’re Warm Kiss
After fumbling the keys with your mittened hands and struggling with a frozen lock, you have finally arrived indoors. Your cardigan-wearing lover, who has been home tending the hearth, gasps at the windblown sight of you and rushes to your side. They press their toasty lips against your frozen ones and it’s like drinking a cup of hot cocoa that loves you back.
The Snowglobe Kiss
You know how it gets real quiet on a snowy night? It’s easy to feel like you’re the only two people in your very own miniature world, and since there’s no one else around…
The Eskimo Kiss
Leave it to the Eskimos, inventors of houses made of snow and shoes that keep you from falling in it, to find a practical yet adorable solution to kissing in extreme cold. The Eskimo kiss not only prevents wind-chapped lips from ever having to touch, but also warms the oft neglected tip of your nose.
The Under the Blanket Kiss
On nights like this, the two of you can allow no part of your body to be exposed. Covers must go over your head. Toes must be pulled as far away from the foot of the bed as possible. There you are. Forehead to forehead, curled into little balls, just one goodnight kiss away officially being the cutest two people in the entire world.
The Two-Flavor Kiss
If you expect to be kissing anyone between late November and early April, you know you’d better have an effective lip lubricant on hand at all times. Yours is Honey Eucalyptus, your paramour’s is Pink Grapefruit and when they meet it’s a flavor explosion.
The “Don’t Kiss Me, I’m Sick” Kiss
You try to warn them; “Don’t! I think I’m getting that thing that’s been going around.” Inevitably, they end up kissing you anyway because they just can’t stand not to. Now, that’s more romantic than Shakespeare’s complete sonnets spelled out in rose petals up the bedroom stairs.
The Gingerbread Latte Kiss
The taste of a seasonally available Starbucks Gingerbread Latte is best experienced as a faint whisper on someone else’s lips.