Ashton Kutcher recently divulged some deep dark secrets about manhood to Glamour. But how accurate/outlandish are his statements? HowAboutWe’s dating bloggers Chiara & Scott run them through the BS detector.
“We notice more where the clothes aren’t than where they are.”
Chiara: Uh, yeah, Ashton. Guys spend more time looking DOWN the dress than at it. We know.
Scott: Yeah, I don’t think this is too shocking a revelation, Kelso.
“Men think they’re fat too. Girls tell their friends, `Oh, you’re not fat at all!’ Guys tell their friends, `Yeah, dude, you really are.'”
Scott: It’s not so bad. It works in reverse, too. We also say things like “Dude, your chest is looking mad chiseled.”
“Rejection. We’re terrified to ask girls out. You should just pass a note that says, ‘Ask me out!’ Otherwise, he’ll be too scared to.”
Chiara: But GIRLS are scared to ask guys out, too! Ugh!
Scott: Yup. This is what the internet is for.
“We basically press the mute button once we get the point of the story. I don’t need to know the color of her bag. Just say what happened!”
Chiara: Ashton, YOU THINK WE DON’T KNOW WHEN YOU DO THIS??
Scott: I don’t know. Sometimes I really do want to know the color of the bag. And her dress. And what the cut was like. More dudes have watched a lot of Project Runway than you think.
“At the end of the day, Mom’s vote matters. If you’re not in with his mom, that’s probably going to be an issue.”
Chiara: Well. That’s nice.
Scott: It’s not nice. It’s pathetic. But, yeah, true.
“Female friends can definitely exist without sex. If he hasn’t tried anything within a month, he’s not going to.”
Chiara: So basically, what you’re saying is, if it hasn’t happened yet, it’s not gonna happen, eh?
Scott: Total crap. These things sometimes take years to develop.