Please note: You do not have to do ALL of these things for your girlfriend. Doing all these things is actually a bad idea — she will become spoiled; you will become — well — whipped. But pick one or two of the most doable to sprinkle into your relationship. These are mind-blowingly simple things; your happy girlfriend will feel grateful to have you and will most likely reciprocate. (Speaking of blowing.)
1. Do that thing for her she’s been putting off forever (she obviously doesn’t want to do it!) like building the shoe rack, taking old clothes to Goodwill, emailing the landlord, sending in that wedding RSVP, etc.
2. Have dinner ready if she gets home late: silverware, wine in her favorite cup, napkins (paper towels are ok), the whole shebang.
3. Charge her phone when she leaves it unattended.
4. Put new music on her iPod.
5. Design her a new desktop background for her computer.
6. If you’re meeting for dinner, get there before her and have a glass of wine waiting. [OK, so this one costs money, but you two were going to order wine anyway, right?]
7. Pick up her laundry when she’s too busy.
8. Let her pick the movie. Or TV show. What I’m trying to say is, turn on The Real Housewives Of Orange County.
9. Make her a drink. (Without your shirt on?)
10. Tell her she looks sexy. Not cute, sexy.
11. Fix something you know she is not going to fix herself. (Bike, computer, headphones, whatever.)
12. Listen when she comes home upset about something and sympathize even if it sort of doesn’t make any sense.
13. If she likes the low-fat or sugar-free stuff, buy it for her, even if you hate it. [Again, costs money, but you needed peanut butter anyway, yes?]
14. Be nice to her friends, or if you really don’t like them, just be polite.
15. If you’re doing something in the apartment like working or cleaning or just hanging out, turn on her favorite album, even if it’s not your favorite.
16. Let her keep her stuffed animals on the bed even if they sort of freak you out and they’re always getting in the way.
17. Brag about her to your friends (and make sure she is just close enough to hear).
18. If you live together, you probably have chores (you clip the cats’ nails, she makes the bed). Surprise her by doing her chore. And try, try, to do a good job. But if your girlfriend is awesome she won’t care if you do a shitty job.
19. Let her have the last handful of popcorn or whatever you are sharing.
20. Keep an eye on her stuff when she is drunk. “Is this your sweater?” is a sweet way to say “You dumbass, you left all your shit smashed under the bar.” (Which is what you are allowed to be thinking.)
21. Read her favorite book. It’s insight into her mind, plus will give you more to discuss.
22. What’s the first thing she does when she gets home from work? Do that for her. Stoke the hookah? Turn on music? Put on pjs? (Do not put her pjs on, but maybe put them out for her.)
23. Eat the food she made and say it’s delicious.
24. Leave a note on the fridge that’s cute and nice, even if it just says “hi!” or an inside joke you two have.
25. Bring her dinner if she has to work late, even if it’s just pb&j. Especially if it’s “just” pb&j.
26. Cover her rent for one year (kidding! That kind of favor belongs on another kind of list.)
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