Over at Glamour, Gena Kaufman wrote yesterday about the perils of online dating in a small town where the online dating pool is pretty limited, which means the odds of messaging someone who has also messaged a friend of yours are not so slim. But I live in New York City, and overlapping messages still happen: I think it has less to do with the size of your dating area (though that obviously is a factor) but more to do with the type of person you are, the type of people you’re friends with, and the inevitable overlap of who that might attract.
Gena has some good advice for people who find themselves in the awkward position of flirtily messaging with someone who is also messaging a friend of yours. It’s important not to write a guy off just because you find out he’s also messaged your friend: after all, he has no idea who you know in real life. (It’s not at all the same thing as hitting on two girls at the same party, for instance.)
And if you have a friend who is using the same dating site as you, feel free to let each other know who you’re messaging, dating, etc, to avoid awkward overlap.
Read the rest of Gena’s advice here.