What to Expect On A Date When You’re In The Romney-Ryan Camp

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As the Olympic games draw to a close, spectators are turning their attention back to the Presidential race, especially since Romney announced his Veep pick. Local watering-holes are likely to be abuzz with Ryan talk. And, if you’re someone all in on the Romney-Ryan ticket, here’s what you should expect to hear from someone you are newly dating if they are…

A Moderate Republican: Seriously?! What, like Romney wasn’t tanking enough on his own? You can have that boring and boorish; I’m staying home.

Plus: 7 Ways To Tell If You Can Handle Dating A Republican
A Libertarian: OMG! Me too! Finally a Republican ticket I can get fired up about. Ryan really gets free markets and I heard he had his own rock band named “Spontaneous Order!”

A Democrat: ROTFL.

Plus: 7 Ways To Tell If You Can Handle Dating A Democrat

A Leftist: Why do you hate poor people so much?

A Clueless and Indiscriminate Talk News Junkie: Wait is Romney the Muslim or the guy who strapped his poopy dog on the top of his car?

A Tea Party Member: You had me at “activist government overreach”

Plus: 5 Ways To Quickly Brush Up On The Political Scene Before A Date

NRA member: I’m all in too. Ryan isn’t afraid to use his 2nd Amendment rights as a remedy to a tyrannical government out of control. Don’t tread on me muthafuckah!

Jennifer Hansen is an occasional blogger, Hockey Mom, runner, and professor of Philosophy. She also has the distinction of once having the great Lauren Passell in her course.