Would You Tell Your Friend They’re Being Cheated On? 4 Scenarios

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Here’s a time-old question you will hopefully never have to answer: if you know that a friend (or even mutual acquaintance!) is being cheated on, should you tell them?

If you walked in on your friend’s girlfriend kissing another guy, you’d probably tell your friend without hesitation. (You wouldn’t?? You’re a terrible friend!)

But unfortunately, most real life situations aren’t as cut and dry as literally seeing someone cheat.

Here are a few scenarios for you to chew on. In the following situations, would you tell?

Scenario 1

You have dinner with a friend. Her boyfriend (who you don’t know that well) couldn’t come at the last minute, so it’s just the two of you. She seems happy.

After dinner, you part ways. She goes home, you walk to a bar across the street, and are there for 15 minutes when in walks…your friend’s boyfriend! With a girl!

He doesn’t see you, but you observe them from afar for a while. Nothing too untoward is happening but…it’s weird! Because you just had dinner across the street! And he’s here with a girl! And why wouldn’t he have said hi! It’s totally fishy, but maybe you just don’t have the right information…maybe the girl is his cousin and your friend totally knows about it.

Would you say something?

Scenario 2

Your roommate is in a long-distance relationship, but cheats on her boyfriend all the time–and you know they don’t have an “open relationship.”

The boyfriend comes to visit and is clearly head over heels with your roommate, and completely oblivious to the fact that she constantly cheats, and all of her friends, whom he’s meeting for the first time, know it.

You feel bad for this dude–he’s a nice guy, and you hate that he’s wasting time and energy and money on a girl who doesn’t take him seriously. You wish there was a way of telling him–anonymous email tipping him off of her ways?–but it’s not really you’re business, and your loyalty should lie with your roommate.

Would you say something?

Scenario 3

You’ve become good friends with your boyfriend’s work colleague and his wife. You find out (with irrefutable proof) that the colleague is cheating on his wife.

Your boyfriend doesn’t want to tell–he works with the guy, and doesn’t think it’s any of your business. You agree that telling would make an awful work situation for your boyfriend, but still feel horrible keeping this secret from his wife every time you see her.

Would you say something?

Scenario 4

Your best buddy is awful to his girlfriend, and you really like her. You’ve known the guy since 5th grade and have been best friends ever since–you’ve tried to talk to him about cheating but he doesn’t listen.

You love your buddy but think his sweet girlfriend deserves better.

Would you say something?

Would any of these scenarios convince you to keep your silence? Or would you always stick up for the person being cheated on? Let us know!