Leslie Knope’s 14 Best Quotes About Love

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When Amy Poehler and Will Arnett announced their divorce last year, it felt like the whole nation mourned in solidarity. After the news broke I received an email from my roommate, then one from my childhood best friend, and finally, a call from my mother. (Okay, fine: I called my mother.) She, while typically disinterested and unaffected by celebrity gossip, felt similarly distraught by the news. Amy Poehler carries a specific, compelling energy. You instantly root for her. You want her to succeed. Brilliant, kind and hilarious, Amy wins us over without effort.

Amy Poehler and Leslie Knope share this charm. We want nothing more than to see Leslie Knope happy and successful, just as we want to see Ron Swanson miserable and fighting with Tammy I. If Ron’s best humor comes from discontent, Leslie charms us most when she is happy. The insecure, confused Leslie of Season 1 feels like a distant memory from the head-over-heels, confident politician we now know as Councilwoman Knope.

Leslie has spent the past two-and-a-half seasons falling in love with Ben Wyatt. Thursday night she will marry him, if all goes to plan. In honor of this momentous occasion, here are some of her funniest and smartest words about relationships:

1. On values: “We need to remember what’s important in life: friends, waffles, work. Or waffles, friends, work. Doesn’t matter, but work is third.” – The Fight (3.13)

2. On friendship: “You know my code: hoes before bros. Uteruses before duderuses… Ovaries before brovaries.” – The Stakeout (2.2)

3. On exes: “One time I was dating this guy for a while, and then he got down on one knee and he begged me never to call him again. One guy broke up with me while we were in the shower together. Skywriting isn’t always positive. Another time a guy invited me to a beautiful picnic with wine and flowers, and then when I tried to sit down, he said, ‘Don’t eat anything. Rebecca’s coming.’ And then he broke up with me.” – Indianapolis (3.6)

4. On saying I love you: “Relationships are like SCUBA diving. If you come up too fast you get the bends. And the reasons why I know this is because I was dating a guy once and we were SCUBA diving and I told him that I loved him underwater and he shot up really fast and got the bends.” – Fancy Party (3.9)

5. On being a strong woman: “I’m a feminist, okay? I would never ever go to a strip club. I’ve gone on record that if I had to have a stripper’s name, it would be Equality.” – Tom’s Divorce (2.11)

6. On loyalty [to Anne]: “I’m sure he’s not cheating on you. But if he is, he’s a monster. And if he’s not, you guys are great together. But if he is, I will kill him.” – Indianapolis (3.6)

7. On being with the person you love: “We could just say screw it and do this thing for real. I miss you like crazy. I think about you all the time. I want to be with you. So let’s just say screw it. I know how I feel and I want to be with you.” – Smallest Parks (4.8)

8. On wedding proposals: “You should ask her on horseback. No, you should ask her in a hot air balloon. No, she should be on a hot air balloon and you should ride up on horseback. Oh, wait. She’s in the balloon; you ride up on horseback. You point to the sky. Up there, skywriting. Marry me, Ann.” – Telethon (2.22)

9. On butts: Leslie: “It is nice to see you again.” Ben: “Are you talking to my butt?” Leslie: “Yes.” – Mrs. Knope Goes To Washington (5.1)

10. On always having a backup plan: “It’s time for this team to come up with a new plan. Phase one of our new plan, you get in the backseat of this cab and we hardcore make out for fifteen minutes.” – Ben’s Parentings, (5.6)

11. On bonding experiences: “Men enjoy it when a woman is better than them at something they love.” – Hunting Trip (2.10)

12. On looking good: “Do you have any of those shirts that look wet all the time? Or like a metal bikini. Oh! You know what’s always sexy? Fingerless gloves.” – Rainy Day (3.1)

13. On fighting for your relationship: “I broke one rule and I will accept a slap on the wrist. But when you sit back and let your relationship be destroyed, you go down as history as a frozen whore. I’m fighting! – The Trial of Leslie Knope (4.9)

14. On happiness: Leslie: “I’m so happy I want to shout it from the rooftops!” “Ben: And she has. We’ve gotten several noise complaints.” – Ben’s Parents (3.6)