Everything Science Taught Us About Relationships in 2013

Pin it

Young scientist

We hate to put a damper on your Christmas cheer, but your significant others are almost certainly lying to you about their holiday spending. Not that it matters, because buying your wife or girlfriend the perfect gift probably won’t convince her to sleep with you anyway.

When you do have sex with your partner, tread lightly. Ladies who fake orgasms are more likely to cheat, but women in committed relationships are more likely to orgasm in the first place. Speaking of infidelity, we found out that there could be a genetic basis for both emotional and sexual jealousy. That said, it’s not necessarily your imagination. If your spouse is acting extra-clingy, he or she might be cheating. By the way, cuddling could be the best thing for your relationship – snuggling releases the “love hormone” oxytocin, which will make you find your significant other much more attractive – but it’s also the most irritating thing a new partner can do in bed.

Technology is bringing us closer together (most people have used social media to creep on their first love), but it’s also tearing us apart. Your partner is cheating because you’re obsessed with your phone, your texting is ruining your relationship, and your Facebook can accurately predict when you’ll break up. Spooky, right?

Unfortunately for the rest of us, hot people only want to bone other hot people, which makes sense, considering opposites officially don’t attract. But if you’re single, don’t sweat it. The more you obsess over your relationship status, the more likely you are to settle for a total dud. Instead, enjoy a night out with your friends, if only because in a group, all of you will look hotter. Failing that, go and get your hair did, because your relationship with your stylist will almost definitely outlast your marriage.

Should you decide to look for love online, make sure you put the color blue in your profile pictures. Whatever you do, don’t take a date to McDonald’s – even if you, like a third of all women, are embarrassed to be seen in public with your new boyfriend.

Image via Veer