5 Bad Habits Women Have In Bedby Brady Tripp on December 27, 2011
In the same way that a criticism often sticks with you more strongly than a compliment, really bad sex can in many ways make a more lasting impression than good sex…and subsequently, can make whatever chemistry you had with someone disappear faster than Charlie Sheen’s relevance.
1. Biting in all the wrong places:
Ear, yes; nipple, sometimes; pleasure-rod, NEVER.
2. Porn noises:
Please no more of the too-loud fake-cheerleader “Yeah, yeah”s in that whiny high-pitched voice, ok? There’s no guy in the room with a handheld, and this isn’t going up on redtube.
Love that you’re getting that into it, but please don’t let me slip out as your body’s about to crash down. Imagine jamming your finger against a brick.
The absolute worst way to disrupt good sex is a loss or lack of rhythm – especially in those positions that demand it. So don’t be that girl who’s flailing around sporadically, or (worse) just laying there motionless [Ed.: aka Starfishing], or we’ll never get something good going.
I’m only half-listening to ANYthing you’re saying while we’re slamming, so please don’t ask me something random like, “Does this mean we’re getting back together?” I promise you I’ll say yes, and later we’ll fight about it.