Hugh Hefner, Playboy (founder) and playboy (lothario) recently told Esquire he’s probably slept with over a thousand women.
Which, to me, a 26 year-old woman, seems like a lot of people.
Like, definitely more people than I intend to sleep with in my lifetime.
But, as we’ve learned, what sometimes seems like a high sex number is actually pretty mild when put in the context of a realistic adult timeline. So, let’s see just how shocking Hefner’s guesstimate actually is.
Hugh Hefner is 86 years old.
He lost his virginity at 22, and got married at the age of 23. We could probably assume that he lost his virginity to the woman who eventually became his wife, but because we don’t know that for a fact, let’s go ahead and say it was someone else.
Hefner claims to have always remained faithful to his first wife, whom he divorced in 1959. So that puts him at 33, with 2 sexual partners, at most. That’s….a lot of catching up to do, to get to 1,000.
But! Over the course of the next 40 years, Hefner founded Playboy and had ample opportunity to sleep with hundreds of women.
Suppose he slept with an average of 20 women a year over the course of those four decades — a VERY low estimate, given how many women, for instance, Don Draper sleeps with per season of Mad Men. (And Don Draper isn’t nearly as powerful or rich as Hugh Hefner was.) Also, when you consider threesomes, foursomes, and other multiples, that number can go up exponentially.
That breaks down to only about 2 sexual partners a month, the equivalent of hooking up with someone every other weekend.* The only difference is, most guys (and girls) only have sex at this rate for a limited number of years, before they’re curtailed by serious relationships, or mere exhaustion. Hefner, we know, kept this up for decades. And because 2 hook-ups a month is relatively modest for someone whose entire job consists of finding and photographing naked women, it’s possible that his actual rate of bedding women during that time period was much, much, higher.
But for the sake of this article, let’s comfortably cap it at 800 by 1989, at which point the 63 year-old Hef got married again. He purportedly stayed faithful to his second wife as well, at least until their 1998 separation, at which point he really went to town again, except this time, to make up for lost time, he really brought out the big guns: twins.
During his 12 year separation from his second wife, Hefner “had relationships” with a number of women from his magazine, including 2 separate sets of twins, the famous “Girls Next Door” (Holly, Bridget, and Kendra), and at least 7 other playmates simultaneously, before settling down with his now wife, 26 year-old Crystal Harris.
So even though Hefner was monogamous (and an octogenarian?!) for much of that time, to reach 1,000 sexual partners he only needed to sleep with an average of 16 sexual partners for year — a pretty modest number when you consider this man would date 7 women at one time. (Again, 16 sexual partners comes down to just a little over 1 a month — easy feat for the world’s most famous playboy. (Not an easy feat for your average Grandpa, it goes without saying.)
My point is, when it comes to insanely high sexual partner counts, is that they aren’t as shocking when you look at sustained periods of singledom (that is, with no monogamous partner, but relatively frequent sex). Hugh Hefner wouldn’t be the ideal example for this, but it would be interesting for someone to compare number of sexual partners with number of sexual encounters — the monogamists might win out on that one, easily.
But man, hats off to Hefner. I mean, how much do you expect your number to go up between the ages of 80-86?!
me: You’re a young, single dude
do you think hooking up wtih an average of two girls a month seems like a lot or a little?
Christopher: i’d say about average. FOR ME, TOO LITTLE!