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Mechanic Invents Bizarre Suction Cup For Childbirth In His Sleep

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Full disclosure: Nothing about this article will seem true. Now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, let me tell you about the Argentinian mechanic Jorge Odón, who watched a YouTube video about getting a lost cork out of a wine bottle, went to sleep, and dreamed of a device that could assist a baby out of a birth canal using the same method.

Odón reportedly woke from his fever dream about birth canals and began constructing a mock device using a glass jar for a uterus, a plastic baby doll, and a fabric bag sewn by his wife. You know, typical scientific equipment they use over at the Mayo Clinic and not a deranged Rube Goldberg machine. His wife awoke, witnessed him playing with his daughter’s doll in the kitchen at 3 in the morning, pronounced him crazy, and then fell back asleep.

The fundamentals of the device are this: A small plastic suction-like bell is placed in the vagina, with the suction resting on the baby’s head. Then two plastic sleeves shoot down and come over the baby’s head like some sort of frosting pipette. The lubed up bag separates the head from the birth canal and as it inflates, the doctor is able to shimmy the baby out. Need I remind you, this thing was cooked up in the throes of REM after a late night YouTube sesh.

On the off chance that someone was as batshit as he was, Odón pitched his idea to a researcher at the World Health Organization, who then ordered testing in 2008 at Des Moines University. The device proved to be useful and could be a game changer in the world of difficult births, in both in rich and poor countries across the globe. When a mother is unable to push her infant out naturally, often doctors must turn to forceps, vacuums, or C-sections, which can play host to myriad medical problems including death and infection. The Odón device can give doctors a safer and cheaper alternative. It is already being tested in health clinics and over 50 safely delivered babies can already declare, “I was brought into this world by a doctor pulling on a slimy plastic bag.”

The welcoming that Odón’s device has garnered from the medical world really makes me consider all of the things I have invented in my sleep. Like that non-melting ice cream cone on wheels that I rode in a dream  I had when I was eight. Oh, the possibilities.

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