A month following the highly-hyped romantic circus known as Valentine’s Day, Pi Day (π or 3.14 to my fellow mathletes) is actually the perfect day for couples to truly express their love and togetherness sans stress and expectation. Think of it as the more fun, carefree (aka better) lovers’ holiday, where you don’t have to make the right reservation or spend money on roses that will eventually die. Pi is a more romantic idea than a diapered baby slinging arrows anyway.
Pi is Constant
Love is constant. Well maybe not constant constant (I’ve been single how long?) but it’s always out there. If not a significant other, you at least love your cat. If not a cat, you at least love beer. If not beer, you’re probably a robot. We’re incapable of not loving something.
Pi Is Irrational
Irrationality is a big component of love. Why else would someone drop everything and move to another state, spend hundreds of dollars on a romantic dinner, or drive around for two hours just to find the seasonally-sold candy cane Christmas tea during the Summer, if not because of love?
π Is Universal in All Languages
Everyone speaks the language of love, and π is a universally understood symbol, sort of like the heart. At least π means something and is actually useful, whereas cartoon versions of the heart aren’t even anatomically correct.
Pi is Unknowable
Even Katy Heron in Mean Girls, the best mathematician in the universe, can get to the end of pi because it is entirely unknowable. That doesn’t mean no one will know love. Quite the opposite. But even when you’re in it, it doesn’t always make a ton of sense and that’s what’s so great about it. And hopefully you won’t be able to see the end of your love either.
Pi Doesn’t Repeat
Neither does love? Okay, scratch that. We’ve all booty-called an ex before, so there might be some repeats. Essentially, love isn’t repetitive. If you really love that person, then you don’t necessarily get tired of the stuff they do, even if they snore.
Pie Can Be Sweet or Savory
Some days, you guys will dress up and go out to a fancy, romantic dinner for two, and other days, you will dress down in sweats and eat the leftovers together on the couch.
Pie’s Are Humble
Because both of you can’t be right when you argue over what year Titanic came out, and admitting that you’re wrong and eating humble pie is a hard lesson to learn but also a necessary one.
Pie Is an Endearment
Sweetie pie. Sugar pie. Grouchy pie. Meat pie? However you slice it, your personal endearments are probably dessert related.
Pies Are Metaphorical
Pies are circular, and circles are everlasting. Love (hopefully) is everlasting. Pies also have crusts, which are delicious, golden, and bear fruit. Love is also delicious, golden, and bears fruit.
Pies Are Amore
Suave crooner Dean Martin did say that “when the moon hits your eyes, like a big pizza pie — that’s amore.” Let’s break that down — pies are amore, amore means love, ergo pies are love.